CoronaVirus Update 2: First Grocery Shopping

I can't help if it makes me laugh.  Don't blame me, it's not my fault if everything is absurd.
 
"Sir, please don't pass the paper money to me."  It turns out that the supermarkets are open after all but have a new procedure for how to handle money.  "Drop your money into this little basket, which is wrapped in plastic."  I dropped the crumpled paper pesos into the basket as instructed.  Her gloved hands picked it up, placed it into the cash register and withdrew some coins which she held out towards me.  "Your change, Sir," and then placed them directly onto my hand.  I laughed.  This is clearly a one-way relationship!  I'm getting a divorce.
 
...I hope she uses the left-hand/right-hand principle when removing the gloves and I wonder how she handles her own money at home.   Money must be the greatest carrier of any bacteria anywhere in the world and is very seldom cleaned if you think about how it circulates.  What a ridiculous regulation that basket nonsense is, especially when it isn't even used.
 
Before that payment comedy scene, I had first gathered my groceries.  I wanted to buy eggs and egg plants but didn't.  The latter were sold out and I forgot the former.  Which comes first?  The egg or the plant?  Neither in my case.  I also wanted oranges but there weren't any so I looked for other citrus fruits, then I noticed one man filling three cases of every single lemon that had been remaining on the racks.  I was staring at him open-mouted for long enough to turn into an air extraction fan.  So, I failed in those, but I did manage to get some tomatoes.  There were no plastic bags though, presumably everybody else had taken them to use as gloves for when they reach the cashier and her dirty money pit.  Never mind, the vegetables lady was waiting to weigh my tomatoes, and she even had a small, clear, plastic bag prepared, held open between her two expert hands.  I lifted two tomatoes intending to drop them into the bag but she let go of the bag and scooped them up out of my hand and placed them on the counter.  This process continued until all of the tomatoes were atop her counter ready to be bagged-up.  Skin-to-skin contact.  Gasp!  Not to mention a little bit silly.
 
On my way home I thought about how quickly the signs and tarpaulin have been prepared in this apocalyptic time of ours.  Some businesses must be doing very well out of this.  It set me thinking about how rife commercial opportunism is in our society.  It is contagious too, more so than covid-19 and I am the proof for I rushed home to look up related website domain names that I could buy.  Unfortunately the two most obvious names have been taken already, with one being owned by Dr WHO, whilst the other is being used to sell cleaning products. Genius. Well, I arrived late again; I missed that train of thought in time to profit on others' misery.  What a wasted opportunity that is!
 
Anyway, in brighter news, it looks like I'll be outside again tomorrow, buying eggs and hopefully oranges.
 
If you're interested, check out that website: coronavirus.com.

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